No One Can Help You - You're The Saviour

Take a moment to breathe... Relax...

Feel the air going in and out of your lungs...

Let go of any tension you feel and make yourself comfortable...

Now... enjoy the read before you...

Reflect upon life's events; how each one held the weight of your choice, creative or destructive... All humans bear thoughts, desires, emotions, but above all: choice. The power to choose to see, act and feel differently. View an obstacle as opposition and you'll meet resistance and foe, but choose to see a test, and you'll be given motivation and target. Moreover, feel anger at betrayal, then act in rage and you'll be misled, but let anger course through uninhibited, gently letting it out, will lead you to a peaceful mind, and what follows is grace and understanding. For, even in the face of enforced events, we have decision; grieve and moan for eternity, or greet yourself with understanding and passion, continuing your path of purpose. Likewise, it is under our control, as owner of our bodies, everything else humanly; that be our love, how much we grow, time spent in peace, acceptance of help, and so on. The decision of creation may appear difficult, however, that is just telling of how much destruction you may have chosen, but know despite that - choice is still yours. Thus, in all of our days, empowered by self-love, we should strive to keep choice under our control, but more importantly, strive to keep choice creative.
~ THOUGHT TWENTY NINE

My 29th thought in a series I call Contemplations.

I wrote this piece as I started to realise no matter how much I try to help people, I can not help them.

I've seen it happen, and have had it happen to me.

You can have therapy worth millions or friends more loyal than the obsessed, none of them can help you.

In this world, live billions of people, yet there is only one person who can help you.

But sometimes, help, progress and healing from that one person can look totally different than you could think. Sometimes the choice to avoid is the right choice.

I'll explain it all. In this blog.

So read on!

I confess.

I am "guilty" of wanting to vent but not wanting immediate answers.

Sometimes life becomes very overwhelming, problems pile up, stress rises and everything seems to be slipping away.

Answers are everywhere, but none seem to solve your problem for very long - or even help at all!

I am a huge supporter of venting with purpose. Expressing your troubles but at the end, truly attempting to find a way through obstacle.

But sometimes, an answer is not what people need...

People can go years being unheard, induced-closure formed by childhood neglect or traumatic heartbreaks. Unheard by not just others, but by themselves too.

Being told that it's okay to cry. It's okay to feel this pain. It's okay to be vulnerable.

It's a crazy realisation for many people.

Because many see progress as an upward line on a graph - it is. 100%. But it's only a upward line on a graph once zoom all the way out.

There are battles we lose.

There are wars we fight for years.

So imagine how freeing it is for a person stuck in toxic positivity to finally see what true positivity is.

The realisation is immense.

But that's what it should be. That's all it should be.

A realisation.

Not a habit. Not a lifestyle. Not a drug.

I fully support being heard, feeling emotion and being loved. But not when you turn that peace into complacency, because that only leads to further suffering.

What I support more, however, is becoming your lover. Becoming the person who hears you. Becoming vulnerable enough to admit failure to yourself but having the self-love to keep going.

And that's what a lot of people are missing.

Self-love.

They go through suffering and suffering, struggle and struggle, all sorts of hardships! Then vent it all out... Hoping to feel some sort of love.

And when they don't? It turns into an addiction where they constantly seek that validation, attention and comfort. Not realising that YOU can give it yourself.

So yeah, I find it very sad when people vent without the want for answers. Because man, it's either a deep issue of misplaced dependency (only dependency should be on yourself), or an tired expression by someone struggling greatly.

Both are horrible.

My piece of actionable advice for those going through this?

Vent to yourself. Write yourself a letter. Show yourself love. Let yourself know you're problems are real but there are ways to get past them.

But most importantly, know, that in the depths of your heart, you have the power to choose happiness.

It might take a while. It may be hard.

But you have full control of how you treat yourself.

And if you treat yourself with love, patience and understanding, and set the path...

There is almost nothing you can achieve.

For with an indefatigable partner in your mind, with a loving carer in your heart, loneliness starts feeling peaceful, suffering starts to feel part of something bigger, losses start feelings like lessons, and you start realising: If I choose creation, If I learn love, If I follow purpose, I can create my future, and I can paint it with a peaceful mind.

All guided by Wisdom.
(If you don't have the wisdom, that's okay, neither did I. Learn it instead!)

I hope you enjoyed that read.

I will be making an essay on the different yous: Me, Myself and I. Or The Wisdom, Emotional Child, and You.

That'll better explain what part of the mind you have control over, and what part of the mind we can only nurture for success!

Until then, take care.

Much love,
Sebastian